Week 3: Family Culture

 One of the things we discussed this week was culture. Culture is beliefs, values, and traditions. All cultures are equally valid, yet all different. Families have different traditions and trends and can celebrate different holidays. My family has a lot of traditions growing up that I have taken and want to apply in my future home. My home growing up was full of lots of laughing and spending time together, and that is something I also want to apply to my future home. There are things from my husband’s family that I admire and would love to apply to my home as well. The goal is to have a Christ-centered home. Family culture can even be traits such as being a touchy-huggy person or the exact opposite. Growing up in a family that does or doesn’t act affectionately in a physical way can affect the way you show affection. My family did not come from a super affectionate family. We like to tease each other a lot, but we rarely say I love you. If I was to randomly tell my sisters I love them, it would be super awkward, and we don’t hug each other. My parents hug us, but my siblings do not. The only exception is my youngest sister. For some reason, even though none of us are affectionate, she is the most touchy huggy person I have ever met. We joke around and say that all of our emotions and affection went into one little person. Whenever I visit my family my youngest sister comes and gives me a hug and then I awkwardly fist-bump my other sister. In my future family, I want to show my children physical affection and I hope that they will reciprocate. My family has gotten slightly more affectionate as we all get older for some reason. I think it’s fun to joke around and tease, but sometimes it can be hurtful, and It’s important to remind each other that you love them, and that is something my sisters and I never did. What’s interesting is that I thought my family was not affectionate, but when I got married to my husband, I found that my family is a lot more affectionate than his. We will go visit his family after a long time of not seeing them and his parents seem happy to see us, but nobody hugs. My parents always hug me when I come home, so I thought this was so strange. I began to think maybe my family is more affectionate than I thought. His family is so kind and giving, and they are some of my favorite people, but they just don’t say I love you or hug like my parents do. My husband and I agree that we both want our future family culture to be a loving, affectionate one where we show our love in all kinds of ways. I have certain friends that I have no trouble giving a hug to when I see them, yet I can not do this with my own family? It makes me sad, but it gives me hope for my future family since I know this is something I did not have growing up, so I can implement this in my family someday. I also do not see my parents show physical affection. By this I mean hugging or kissing, nothing else. Sometimes it seems like my parents are just partners taking care of children since they take turns driving us places or taking care of us, but it does not seem like they are head over heels in love. I know that this is common for parents, but I have a friend and her parents are so cute and they still act like they are dating and they laugh together and you can tell they love each other. My parents are very much in love, they just show it differently. In my future family, I want my children to see my husband and I’s love for eachother, even if they tell us we are gross for kissing in front of them!